50+ Hilarious Squirrel Jokes
Looking for a way to make your kids laugh? These squirrel jokes are perfect for family fun, classroom giggles, and all-around nutty humor. From squirrel puns to squirrel nut jokes and even squirrel dad jokes, there’s something here for everyone. Let’s dive in and get squirrely!

Table of Contents
Squirrel Puns to Start the Giggles
Why don’t squirrels ever fight?
They’re always willing to nut it out.
What do you call a squirrel with a great sense of humor?
A stand-up com-nut-dian!
Why did the squirrel get promoted?
He was nuts about his work.
How do squirrels stay organized?
They keep everything in acorn-dance.
Why don’t squirrels ever tell secrets?
They’re afraid of squirrel leaks.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite kind of math?
Nut-matics!
Why are squirrels such good acrobats?
They always land on their nut-feet.
How do squirrels stay cool in the summer?
They hang out under the nut shade.
What did the squirrel say to the oak tree?
I’m nuts about you!
Why are squirrels bad at poker?
They’re always squirreling away their acorns!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite ice cream flavor?
Peanut butter cup.
Why did the squirrel start a business?
He wanted to cash in on his nut profits.
How do squirrels call each other?
On their acorn-phone!
Why did the squirrel join the circus?
He was great at high-nut walking.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite holiday?
Nut-cracker season!
Nutty Squirrel Jokes
What’s a squirrels favorite ballet?
The nutcracker!
What’s a squirrels favorite spice?
Nut-meg
Why don’t squirrels get lost in the forest?
They always remember where their nuts are.
What do you call a squirrel who’s really good at baking?
A nutty chef!
What did the tree say to the squirrel?
Leaf me alone!
Why did the squirrel bury the can of fish?
Because tuna spelt backwards is “a nut”
Why did the squirrel open a bakery?
To make the best nut muffins around!
Which squirrels make the best heros?
Flying squirrels
What’s a squirrels favorite movie?
The nutty professor
How do squirrels make decisions?
They nut over the details.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite sport?
Nut-ball!
How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
Why was the squirrel so excited about autumn?
It’s when the nuts fall!
What do squirrels say when they solve a problem?
That’s cracking good!
Where do squirrels go on holiday?
Beech trees!
Why don’t squirrels play hide-and-seek?
They’re too nutty to stay hidden.
Why couldn’t the dog find the squirrel?
It was barking up the wrong tree
What’s a squirrel’s favorite way to travel?
By nut-mobile!
Why was the squirrel a great singer?
He had perfect nut pitch.
What do you call a squirrel in a church?
A chipmunk!
What do you call a squirrel that solves crimes?
Squirrel-lock Holmes
What’s a squirrel’s favorite hobby?
Collecting nut-abilia!
Why did the squirrel get kicked out of the library?
He went nuts!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite snack?
Anything that’s a-macadamia-ing!
Why are squirrels great party planners?
They know how to go nuts!
What’s a squirrel’s dream job?
A nut critic.
Squirrel Dad Jokes That Will Crack You Up
Why did the squirrel bring a backpack?
To carry all his nuts to work!
What do squirrels do on their day off?
They just nut around.
Why don’t squirrels ever lose their keys?
They keep them in their nut pockets.
What do you call a squirrel with no nuts?
Hungry!
Why are squirrels terrible at spelling?
They can’t nut spell check.
What did the baby squirrel say to its parent?
I’m nuts about you, Dad!
Why did the squirrel join the orchestra?
He wanted to play the nutcracker suite.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite board game?
Nut-opoly!
Why did the squirrel go to school?
To learn how to be a nut-professor.
Why was the squirrel’s house so messy?
He had too many nutty projects.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite dessert?
Pecan pie!
Why don’t squirrels ever get bored?
They’re always nut-ivating new ideas.
Why did the squirrel win the marathon?
He had the most nut-rition!
What do squirrels eat when they’re sick?
Nut-meal.
Why did the squirrel stay up all night?
He was cracking up at squirrel jokes!
Everyday Life with Squirrels: Jokes That Hit Close to Home
What do squirrels do at the grocery store?
Look for the best nut deals!
Why did the squirrel get a traffic ticket?
He went nuts on the highway!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite thing to watch on TV?
Nut-flix!
Why did the squirrel refuse to clean his room?
He said, “It’s my nut den, and I like it messy!”
How do squirrels pay for things?
With their nut credit cards!
Why did the squirrel avoid going to the gym?
He said, “I already work out climbing trees all day!”
What do squirrels write in their journals?
Today’s nut stash locations.
Why don’t squirrels ever get bored?
They’re always finding new trees to climb.
What do squirrels order at a coffee shop?
A hazelnut latte with extra foam!
Why don’t squirrels like rainy days?
It washes away all their nut hiding spots.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite chore?
Dusting with their fluffy tails!
Why did the squirrel visit the dentist?
He chipped a tooth cracking nuts.
What do squirrels dream about?
Finding the world’s biggest acorn.
Why do squirrels love weekends?
More time to stash nuts!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite app?
SquirrelSpace—where they connect with other nutty friends.
These squirrel jokes are sure to bring a smile to any kid’s face (and probably the adults too!).
Whether you’re telling these jokes at the dinner table, during a car ride, or just for fun, they’re bound to make everyone laugh.